When Motherhood Rewrites Your Author Journey: Finding Magic in the Unexpected
Once upon a time, I thought I had mastered the art of the author-mom juggling act. In the era of writing "Amoura Awakened," I wove stories in the wee hours of the morning, during afternoon naps, and huddled in my car outside ballet class, dreaming of the day when quiet school hours would stretch before me like blank pages waiting to be filled with words. But life, it seems, had a different story in mind.
Plot Twists and Fever Pitches
Enter the unexpected protagonist of my current chapter: my son's health. About six months ago, my three-year-old son, Bowie, began experiencing intense fevers every 20-25 days. They came on like the flip of a switch—one moment, he was playing and happy; the next, he was flat on the couch, refusing to eat or drink, refusing to walk because his legs hurt, his little body blazing like a raging furnace. The suddenness of his fevers transformed our routines into a haze of worry and sleepless nights. The once-coveted quiet hours evaporated into a whirlwind of doctor's visits and Google searches as we sought to unravel the mystery of what we now suspect might be PFAPA (Periodic Fever, Aphthous Stomatitis, Pharyngitis, Adenitis), a rare periodic fever syndrome.
In the face of this new reality, my carefully crafted writing routine crumbled like a house of cards. The creative well that once overflowed with Amoura's magical adventures ran dry as my mind became consumed by the real-life quest to understand and support my son.
The Weight of the Unwritten Word and the Unfinished Task
In the world of indie authorship, the guilt of not producing extends far beyond the unwritten word. It's the social media posts left unshared, the marketing strategies gathering dust, and the pitches to press that remain unsent. As an independent author, I wear many hats—writer, marketer, publicist, and entrepreneur. Each role comes with its own set of expectations and responsibilities, a never-ending to-do list that can feel like a weight on my shoulders.
But when life threw me a curveball in the form of my son's health journey, that weight became almost unbearable. As I immersed myself in the world of autoinflammatory syndromes, trying to unravel the mystery of his symptoms, the tasks of running my author business felt like an impossible mountain to climb.
How could I craft engaging social media content when my mind was consumed with worry? How could I pitch my book when my energy was focused on advocating for my son? The chapters I wasn't writing were just the tip of the iceberg—beneath the surface lay a whole infrastructure of author tasks left undone.
Embracing the Unplanned Chapters
Amid this unexpected detour, I've come to realize that perhaps the greatest magic lies in accepting the story life hands us. I'm learning to embrace the idea that my author journey, much like Amoura's journey to the page, won't always follow the plot I've outlined.
Rewriting the Author-Mom Narrative
Now, I'm learning to:
Dance with flexibility rather than clinging to rigid schedules
Cherish the small victories, even if they're measured in moments rather than pages
Recognize that some chapters are meant for living, not just writing
Trust that the stories and the readers will wait patiently for my return
Allow my experiences as a mother to infuse my writing with new depth and meaning
Extend grace and understanding to myself as I navigate this unexpected chapter
The Magic in the Margins
Here's the secret no one tells you about being an author-mom: it's not about perfect balance, but about beautiful chaos. It's about finding the magic in the margins, the spaces between the lines where life happens.
My son's health journey has become an unexpected teacher, schooling me in patience, resilience, and the art of being fully present. These lessons will seep into my stories, adding layers I couldn't have planned.
Embracing the Journey, Detours and All
So I'm learning to embrace the detours, to trust that even when motherhood rewrites my author journey, it's adding richness to the narrative. The story of being an indie author is about so much more than the tasks we check off our list. It's about the courage to embrace our own unique journey, detours and all, and trusting that our stories, both on and off the page, are worth telling.
In the end, the most powerful stories are often the ones we didn't see coming. As I navigate this unexpected chapter in my son's health journey and my own journey as an author-mom, I'm learning that the magic lies in embracing the unplanned, in finding the extraordinary in the ordinary, and in letting life's detours guide me to stories I never knew I needed to tell.